I truly have found my soulmate and partner in life. I am so very blessed.
In no way do I miss your know it all, disrespectful, egotistical self. Not having you in my life for the past year was better than you ever being in it.
My life is kind of stuck. Not really moving forward, but not moving backwards. I am struggling with this.
The original plans for my life were to get a certain degree and go into a certain career field. That obviously is not happening. I quit school because there was no way i was going to fit in again. After everything that happened, there was no way for me to be happy there. I was constantly looked down on and not respected. It wasn’t a healthy place for me. So I quit that, thus, ending my career path. Ok. when I quit school, I also lost the only social group I had, minus one friend.
That friend is killed. Leaving me with nothing. I have a friend from school, and a friend from an old group of friends. This is good, but it is still tied up to drama and yadda yadda.
So I get a job in which I am severely underemployed. Underemployed might be an understatement. I feel pretty worthless in this position. I even have coworkers telling me that I am underemployed. It is nice to know that other people noticed what I was feeling but had never put into words.
So, I am stuck in this crappy job, not really having a social life, and then I take a trip to Denmark.
Once again, I feel at home. In looking at the sociopolitical climate in Denmark-I belong. I recently watched the movie “God Bless America” and it is totally how I feel. Coming home from Denmark and seeing my facebook feed full of people complaining that their guns are being taken away by the president just makes me groan and wonder what the hell is going on with my country.
Friend I wish I had, friend who I wish we were sitting over beer and great conversation, I desperately need your advice. I have an opportunity to live in Denmark for a year caring for kids. It is like a preschool/teaching English type of situation. I would live there for a year to get a feel for it. I would be close to Casper and could see him a few times a week, but most importantly, I would live in Denmark and experience Danish life for a while.
But Friend, I would leave all my stuff here. My car, appliances, my family. I didn’t have much of a relationship with my father growing up and the relationship between us is getting better everyday. I would leave my grandparents who are not in the best health. I would leave my mom. I don’t really have friends that I leave, so that is really not a concern to me. It feels really weird, but leaving my car behind is the most investigating part of this thought. Or I just tell myself that because leaving my dad while I still have daddy issues would be the most investigating.
But staying here means stuck in a place that makes me roll my eyes everyday. I am in a place where I sit at home on Friday nights and consider calling the cops on the kids having a party next door.
Friend, I am truly stuck in life right now. I really don’t know where to go next. I have no direction, no ambitions, and no thought on what is next. All I know is what I have now is not working for me.
I know I want to try something new. I have that chance by moving to Denmark. My mom suggested it. I just don’t know what to do.
Friend, i really wish you could answer me. I honestly need a friend to talk to. I need to hear someone elses life, I need to have conversation, I need to laugh. I don’t know when I laughed last.
I really have no idea what my next step in life is. Everything I worked for is done. I didn’t plan for anything else. What do I do now?
Today I got a magnetic field pushed into my brain and survived my first earthquake. What did you do?